TeEN SPEAK- A LOVING FATHER, TO A SON

My "Teen Speak" column, is to give the young people voice as well as to encourage and inspire them. In this column, I write about topics that are of concern to them and are of concern about them! I hope that in these words, the young people, pre-teen, "tween", and right on up through their early 20's, hear a voice of wisdom, of love and of experience. I hope that you receive this and come to know that WE hear you! We understand. We share with you in your life's' journey. YOU are NOT alone!

THIS particular article is dedicated to my son. These words are dedicated to ALL sons! Though I am a mother, wisdom knows no bounds. It is not limited to gender. As I had no one, not even my sons Dad to rely on for regular assistance in the raising and teaching of our son, I had but one recourse. And that was to seek a higher force. This action caused me to reach for the love of God. to seek it. to embrace it. To give over and to give into it! In seeking a new way for myself, learning of my own individuual purpose, including being a "good" mother to my son inspite of circumstances and self, I had to move into a new way of thinking, move into a new way of being! The more I embraced and grew in what I found, a thirst and hunger grew for that higher which I couldn't even see!

So in reverence to that, which God is and represents.... wisdom, faith, love, preservation, protection, redemption and insight, knowledge, understanding, patience and victory is what brings me to this point in this writing. My reliance on hope in the victory of my journey with my son to raise him to be a productive, sound-minded, man of integrity is how we got here, to the 20th anniversary of his birth! Because we got here, is why I choose to share the following words of Proverbs chapter 2!

Though not in the flesh, did such a father exist for my son, my son's still making it! Because through the "spirit of God", divine inspiration, words of a loving Father still found their way to him. And these words are just as real and speak to my son's life, as if a fleshly father would have done the honor. Here, A Loving Father Speaks to a Son in wisdom, sincerity, honesty, openness, in hope and compassion. These words are to guide, direct, protect and light the sons path as he makes his way through life and emerges onto the path of completing his purpose in righteousness.

FOR MY SON who is soon turning 20 and will be experiencing a new part of life as a young mature man stepping into his own, it has compelled me to send out this message. It was not easy raising a boy as a single woman. I've done the best I can by taking comfort in the wise. Trust that wisdom sons and remember it as you step into a new dimension of life and encounter its struggles as well as its victories...but encountering them as a prepared man and not as an unknowing child!

I am preparing to send my son out covered and drenched with these words of a loving Father. My son soon will be stepping out on his own without Mother to clear the way for him. It will soon be my time to step back into the shadows just a little further as my son steps a little bit farther out from me. As he stretches his "man" wings, I call out "Fly Baby Boy, Fly"! Fly wearing the "full armor of God", believing he has a purpose filled destiny for you to meet, greet embrace, walk, run and live in! Don't Stop now!

Brad, May Gods Grace and Mercy always be with you.

Fly, filled with ever growing desire for knowledge and wisdom!

And may these words always follow you, echoing in your heart.

Be wise my son! Be wise.

* Son, my heart breathed when I saw the following passage on your computer after you went to bed. You didn't know that I saw it.

For having seen it, I have to tell you that I get it, Son! I get now why you tell me you hear me.

And I can hear YOU for the 1000sdth time even now as you sleep, saying

"Mom, I hear your lessons and they help me even when you are not around. No seriously! I can hear your voice on certain things even when you are not around! I know you love me! But God speaks to me and my heart too! I'm going to be OK, Mom! Thank you for believing." )

Proverbs 2 (New International Version)

Moral Benefits of Wisdom

¹ My son, if you accept my words
and store up my commands within you,

² turning your ear to wisdom
and applying your heart to understanding,

³ and if you call out for insight
and cry aloud for understanding,

⁴ and if you look for it as for silver
and search for it as for hidden treasure,

⁵ then you will understand the fear of the LORD
and find the knowledge of God.

⁶ For the LORD gives wisdom,
and from his mouth come knowledge and understanding.

⁷ He holds victory in store for the upright,
he is a shield to those whose walk is blameless,

⁸ for he guards the course of the just
and protects the way of his faithful ones.

⁹ Then you will understand what is right and just
and fair—every good path.

¹⁰ For wisdom will enter your heart,
and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul.

¹¹ Discretion will protect you,
and understanding will guard you.

¹² Wisdom will save you from the ways of wicked men,
from men whose words are perverse,

¹³ who leave the straight paths
to walk in dark ways,

¹⁴ who delight in doing wrong
and rejoice in the perverseness of evil,

¹⁵ whose paths are crooked
and who are devious in their ways.

¹⁶ It will save you also from the adulteress,
from the wayward wife with her seductive words,

¹⁷ who has left the partner of her youth
and ignored the covenant she made before God.

¹⁸ For her house leads down to death
and her paths to the spirits of the dead.

¹⁹ None who go to her return
or attain the paths of life.

²⁰ Thus you will walk in the ways of good men
and keep to the paths of the righteous.

²¹ For the upright will live in the land,
and the blameless will remain in it;

²² but the wicked will be cut off from the land,
and the unfaithful will be torn from it.

With Love

Community Corner - MY HEALTH & Pleaurisy

HEY READERS,

I want to just take a moment to tell you of a health concern that recently has and still is affecting me and my respiratory system. Yep! It's that time of season. Further more, the world we live in, it's that time of life! Where you could be hit by anything at anytime. The point in telling you about my condition, is just me me wanting to warn you. Just want you to be careful with the weather changing so quickly, at least if you're in Michigan like I am. Anyway, I have something called 'Pleurisy'. Don't worry. Its not fatal, (THANK GOD). Nor is it contagious. And if you heard me cough, you might mistake it for a cold or a really bad smokers cough. It's not a cold, nor do I smoke, so that strikes those things.

What PLEURISY IS, is a respiratory illness often medically treated like Bronchitis. It is temporary and can stay that way, if you get medical attention and take care of yourself! but if left untreated, it can develop into Pneumonia and you don't want that! I was fortunate that I got help after several very painful days of developing a very dry cough. The cough was accompanied by a deep, eye squinting, breath-stopping, head hanging, chest pain! That even when I swallowed my saliva, by the time it got down into the middle of my chest, it hurt just for that to squeeze past! Turns out my lung lining and airways were inflamed and something was rubbing against the other that wasn't supposed to rubbing against the other anything! UGHHH! I have no real cold symptoms, not a lot of sneezing, running nose, running eyes, fever, headache too much. I needed medical attention. The pain was too great!

I spent 4 hours in a local hospital Emergency on this past Sunday morning. After about 20 minutes of getting there, I was signed in at the registry, a mask was put on my face as is common with cough. I was then escorted to the treatment area and in less than an hour, I was put in a room right next to he nurses area. I was put quickly on fluids, including intravenous antibiotics. A nurse took blood sample, a urine sample, and I started being thoroughly being tested. Testing included flu testing for "any flu" the nice nurse said as she stabbed me in both nostrils with a long cotton swab that touched the back of my throat! All this was finally accompanied by a Thorough chest x-ray. I was also given a strong cough medicine, a pain reliever and told "to lay back and try to relax" while my results were being finalized. After those few hours and all the quick, professional and almost painless (minus the nose jabbing) patient care. All in all, I was sent on my way with good news, a bunch of prescriptions, including 20 doses of antibiotics, a respiratory inhaler, and a sun bright smile from my Doc who said she recognized the symptoms in me right-away as soon as she saw me!

She described her experience as she "thought she was having a heart attack and about to die." The chest pain she experienced was just as great! She said she knew exactly what I meant with the squeezing, saliva chest thing! It was good to have my lead medical person know what I was going through! This may seem strange reader, but hearing her say that about her experience, while standing in front of me strong, healthy and smiling, actually made me feel better almost immediately if only in my mind. My body has later to catch up to that healing feeling. (Next week, I should be right as rain and not sounding like a frog out in the rain! My voice is croaking. Just call me croaker! Ha!) Still, the Doc made me feel better, filled me with hope. What she said even took the sting out of having a new hospital bill! Hey, I gotta think about that too! Who you think gotta find a way to pay it? Santa Clause?

Anyway reader, let this be a lesson. Don't take your health for granted and don't just start popping cough drops. Go get checked out! You are worth the cost.

Not having medical insurance myself right now, I discovered the miracle of low cost prescription help at Meier's Grocery store. The nice Pharmacist there even told me about their discount drug store card they can run through to check on prices. The friend that was with me, even told about a similar Prescription discount program at Walmart, Kroger's Grocery Stores and Target, none the less. On the way home from the hospital, she was willing to take me to these places to the get the best deal, but Meijers came through. Wow! That's a friend! And some of these places I mentioned, you can get $4.00 generic antibiotics. Check it out the next time you need to fill a prescription and think you can't afford to take care of yourself!

Take care of yourself people.

PROMISE ME! PROMISE YOURSELF.

I'm resting now.

Bye for now, Meetta

MY LIFE - SLOW DOWN, MEETTA!

Why is it Dear Reader,

...that because people are content in their slow moving lives that they want others to do the same? Anybody doing anything different is offensive to them in some way because they dare to be different. Those "turtle moving" people may be content with how their lives are going, but that doesn't mean that everyone else has to slow down to fit their way of living too!

"SLOW DOWN, MEETTA", she called out as I was dashing past her and some of the others. Without turning around, "USE IT OR LOSE IT SISTER!", I called back and kept on going. I was at work and don't walk at the same pace as many of co-workers. I usually walk at a brisk pace. I am a walker out of need first, then for exercise and then fun. I have built up momentum and it doesn't matter where I'm going, brisk is still my usual pace, unless I'm in pain or something.

Still, my pace seems to bother others, because somebody on my Job has mentioned it more than once. Over my nearly 7 years at this job, I have actually heard much talk about my pace. I still don't understand why it bothers people so! Who can figure?

See, I know many of them drive A LOT! Many of them drive even to their nearby businesses close to their homes! Most walk very little beside at work. In conversations with some, I've found that many of them simply don't exercise the body they've been given outside of usual cleaning or errands. Maybe they walk the dog if they have them, but even that's usually it! Nothing else too physical such as walking on a regular basis for any real length of time. So, I think when they look at me, it reminds them of what they are NOT DOING for themselves and so hence the shout out, "SLOW DOWN MEETTA!"

And these are people who are still of a viable age. They are in their 40's, 50's and 60's, but you wouldn't know it by their pace! Many of them walk along the same speed as one of our 92 year old co-workers. God bless her soul, and I have not yet heard her complaining or telling anyone to slow down! She told me when she was younger, she was moving at my pace too. "Keep it up as long as you can", she said to me one day as I was leaving her behind, upon her urging of course. God love her! And so I will push forward, walking briskly taking advantage of the time that I have to exercise this body and "use it, lest I lose it."

Reader,

There is another reason that the shout out "Slow Down Meetta" bothered me. I am 42 and I think about the gifts and talents that I have, and how I haven't yet figured out how to really push forward into them. I've been told I am a Master Presenter, Eloquent and passionate Public speaker. I've also been told I am an engaging and Charming Story Teller (as is my profession). Many of the guests that have heard me say, "I could listen to you all day." but where has that gotten me. After seven years of being a hired professional Public Speaker and Story Teller, where has it gotten me? And what about my writing? Where is that going? I dare to question.

I should be onstage somewhere or in a pulpit, or on the radio and writing for some wonderful international something or other, where my voice and talents can be heard, used for the purpose of engaging and encouraging SOMEBODY somewhere! I should be writing for some Inspirational paper, encouraging people to also do GREAT THINGS! Readers, here's my challenge to you. IF YOU THINK MY WRITINGS HAVE CHALLENGED YOU IN SOME WAY. Maybe my writings have encouraged you or CAUSED YOU TO OPEN YOUR MINDS VIEW...LET ME KNOW! You don't have to, but I'D APPRECIATE IT! Now back to my self pitying. Where was I? Oh Yeah, I should be doing great things with my talents, not necessarily to be obscenely, materialistically rich, but to be of some good use that God can be pleased with. But where am I? And what am I doing? Ah! my life...( I won't complain at this precise second)... is in Gods hands.

I have such gifts and know I can be very powerful in voice and in my writings. My work in both, even on a small scale, has proven that! I know I could be a ground breaker, a ground shaker. I could also crush the mold that was used to form. A mold the world and circumstances would use to bind me. I know I could encouraging many others on a grand scale to do the same thing! Break her molds and establish themselves as the new gifts of creativity and or corporation!

As an African-American woman of very big talents and bigger dreams, I think of Hattie MCDaniel, Butterfly McQueen, Josephine Baker, Billie Holiday, and Madam C.J. Walker and Sojourner Truth. I think of these particular ladies because they crushed the mold that formed and was destined to bind them. They dared to dream! They dared to believe! They dared to dream and hope. They dared to want more! They dared to use the gifts and talents they had, cultivating them into fine art of living. They took no prisoners! They held no one else back, only pulling, pushing and encouraging others to push as these women themselves pushed full steam ahead, not slowing down...for anyone!

When I was growing up and even as an adult, people were so quick to speak negative things over me, spewing their doubt because I challenged them in some way. Slow down, indeed! When I get my CHANCE like these ladies did, I will keep my momentum up and I will not slow down...not for anyone! So even with my blog,i will march on! Whatever jobs I can get with my speaking...I will gain momentum and even fuel up! So, you'd better catch up with me!

I know all the women I mentioned all had different ways of getting to and living out their destinies, so my story will be just as unique. I will get there if God the Father and Jesus the son, has anything to say about it! Just blowing off steam. Still I believe. And so it is written, "And your gifts will make room for you".

BE ENCOURAGED!

And don't slow down!

Meetta

Social Scene - Do you love yourself?

Welcome to Social Scene.

Here, I talk about issues that affect society collectively. Each and every one of our lives and what we do with them, affects others and can create a chain reaction. We must be in tune with ourselves in order to recognize our influence on the world around us. With that said, I will just get right to today's topic of discussion.

Many people have difficulty with other people in all area of their lives. People have many different ways to handling the situation, but how many of them produce a positive outcome that everybody comes out of it, intact? There is wisdom in dealing with your neighbor to produce that positive affect. First, you have to look at yourself! The wisdom is in this following statement. The best way to get along with your neighbor is to...

..."LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR, AS YOU LOVE YOURSELF."

Question is; DO YOU LOVE YOURSELF?

Now before you answer, think carefully!

Ask yourself some tough questions to see where you stand with yourself. For example, Are you forgiving of yourself? Can you allow yourself some mistakes without beating yourself up continually?

'Cause if you can't forgive yourself, how can you forgive anyone else?

Here are just a few more, but feel free to create other questions for yourself.

Do you even know what forgiveness really means?

Do you hold grudges?

Are you kind?

Do you believe in God?

If you are Christian, or consider yourself a person of "faith", do you read, study and live by God's written word?

Do you receive and receive Jesus as your Lord and Saviour?

Do you cherish the principles of God and strive to live by them, holding them near and dear to your heart?

Do you appreciate the gifts, talents, and abilities that you have?

Do you exercise them?

DO YOU APPRECIATE GIFTS, TALENTS AND ABILITIES OF OTHERS?

Do you "rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep"?

Do you care about others AND show it?

Are you selfish or self-centered?

Do you take care of (providing for, listening to, appreciating and respecting ) those you claim you love? Especially your children, parents and mates?

Are you a person of INTEGRITY?

Do you create or spread gossip?

Do you share personal business of another that's been told in confidence to you?

Though we are not to trust (put full confidence) into anyone ...

..Do you consider yourself "trust-worthy", worthy of trust?

Do you share a conversation you overheard even when you were not invited in it?...

....Even when the conversation does not include you and is not harmful to anyone?

Can you keep a secret or do you tell (anyone) even when you say you won't?

*Often we try and justify who we tell, like a sister, husband, brother or best friend etc.?

Do you find yourself trying to listen to other peoples conversations meaning you make efforts to hear?

Do you interrupt into conversations that you are not invited in, butting in?

Do you keep your word when you tell someone you will do something?

Do you lie?

Do you spend time in others people personal business even when not invited?

Do you know what it means to create harmony?

Do you exercise that knowledge?

Do you acknowledge your wrongs and make amends for them?

Do you seek to "corrupt" other people with your bad ways? If so, Why?

Does truth, compel you?

Are you easily offended?

Or do you just blame the other person?

Do you seek or act on revenge?

DO YOU LOVE YOURSELF?

Do you like yourself?

Do you eat healthy?

Do you over-eat?

Do you smoke (anything)?

Do you use inhalants?

Do you dip snuff or chew tobacco? This has caused other illness including cancer of the mouth.

Do you do drugs?

Do you drink alcohol in excess...EVER?

Do you exercise?

Do you go get medical checkups when you need them?

Do you get counseling or seek wisdom when you have a problem?

Do you care about your appearance?

Do you bathe?

Do you Comb your hair?

Do you Brush your teeth?

Do you always wear clean clothes?

Do you press or iron you clothe when needed

Do you clean your house, Apartment, or room?

Do you ever really take time out for yourself?

Are you productive in positive things?

Do you work, go to school or volunteer?

Do you find yourself being envious and resentful of people who are?

Are you a giver of your time, knowledge, services, goods and money?

Do you find it necessary to keep learning, and educating yourself?

Do you smile?

Are you a person who enjoys sharing happiness or creating dis-harmony?

Does your presence around others add peace or take away from it?

Are you joyful?

Do you respect your body?

Are you sexually active outside of your husband or wife?

Remember sex outside of marriage often brings about moral decay. It also brings unnecessary problems.

(ALL QUESTION ARE ALSO FOR BOTH MEN AND WOMEN)

Do you have more than one sexual partner?

In truth, there is no double standard for men or women when it comes to anything, especially sex! People say that there is to justify their actions. GET SMART! Just because you say something is right does not mean that it is! You are just fooling yourself and duping others in the process! There are already wrong and right standards set in the the very heart of man (all human kind) at the beginning of Creation. You may be fooled, but the wise man (and wise woman) will not be fooled into just any way of thinking!

Just as sexually "loose" women (paid or unpaid) are considered whores, the men that have sex with them are just condemned as "whore mongers". Who is the reason there are whores? Men!!!

But that's not popular or "cool" to talk about! P-shaw!

Listen here,

"YOU CAN'T WALLOW IN DIRT AND

COME OUT CLEAN!"... This is a thought to contemplate!

One last question: ARE YOU HAPPY?

See, asking yourself questions like these and answering honestly can help you find out more about yourself! You can use these questions and answers as gauges to learn how you feel about you! Are you the kind of person you want to be? If not, what are you doing about it? How you feel about yourself does directly affect and greatly impact your relationships! Self, often dictates and shape our thoughts of the world. How you feel about yourself does often determine the success and failure of your views of others! And if you don't like yourself, how can you like another? Certainly if you don't love yourself, how can you truly love anyone else?

Meetta

COMMUNITY CORNER- BUYING A HOME

Hello Readers,

This is community information. If you live in the Detroit, Michigan area or the Dearborn Heights, Michigan area and want to become a homeowner, this information is for you! I want to tell you about 'Mission Of Peace'. This is a Faith Based Organization that is a HUD Approved National Housing Counseling Intermediary. Mission of Peace agents will help you prepare for and purchase a home in wisdom. They will assist you in gaining the knowledge you need to prepare for and purchase a home. They offer FREE SERVICES.

'Mission of Peace is "investing in people, moving communities beyond."

Mission Statement:"Breaking down barriers to home ownership through faith."

Vision Statement: "Mission of Peace-Creating a better America through home ownership. Some of the Services that they offer are Bankruptcy Counseling, Budget Counseling, Report Evaluation, Foreclosure Counseling, Pre and Post Purchasing Counseling and several others.

* Call and make an appointment before you go into the office, please.

Detroit Area

333 W. Fort Street

Suite 1350

Detroit, MIchigan 48226

Phone (313) 967-0140

Fax (313-967-0123

MEETTA'S READERS- Readers Comments

READERS,

This is where I post your comments.

I thank you for reading and sharing.

Meetta

Ms. Meetta's article, "SAVE OUR Boys", posted on October 2, 2010. Column, "On Her Soap Box".

Comment By:

David Green, of Detroit, Michigan

Teacher/ Detroit Fireman

"Great Blog Meetta!"

(This is) Something that I am very passionate about-The African American Family in America (AAFA includes Our Boys). The AAFA has deteriorated steadily since the early 1960's. So much so, that its been said that we are on our 3rd generation of dysfunctional families in Black America. If one looks into the past at the African American family, the saying "It Takes a Village..." goes back beyond the memory of anyone alive today. It goes back to African villages!

I have always thought that Hollywood often forecasts what will happen in society or eventually tells the truth about a tragic event of the past. There was a movie (can't call the name right now but it had Kadeem Hardison in it) that came out in the late '80's or early 90's that dealt with the mob getting into the drug trade. Anyway, I have always thought that there was a conspiracy to inject heroin & cocaine into the black community in order to destroy us. What they never counted on was that those same drugs would one day reach the doorstep of wealthy Americans as well. So not only have these drugs destroyed Black America...it's destroying all of America one family at a time!

Prior to the heavy drug trade there was honor among thieves. They would never hurt women or children. Not so today as women & children are at the center of this destruction.

When jobs were scarce in the early 1900's black men could go sharecrop & job hunting KNOWING that when he came home they'd have the support of FAMILY (wife, kids & even parents)...so their failures never seemed so bad because you ALWAYS could rely on family to lift you up and ready you for the next days search. Well, once you throw hard drugs [fast forward to the 1960's] (not just corn liquor) into the mix, that caused black men to spiral into an uncontrollable nose dive. We then took out our aggressions on our women & children...and if it didn't kill us, it effectively passed the violent behavior on to the children (they then come to see the strung out/abusive behavior as "normal") and they too would pass it on to their offspring. It's a depressing mindset for anyone to have to deal with. It hinders ambitions of higher education & it gets us away from our African roots that were cultivated in love of one another. The drugs have turned thieves into killers & have lead far too many to a permanent life behind bars or in the "system". I feel you in your passion for this subject...it's so much I could say, but I can't type that much!!! I admire your works & please keep on pushing on. I'd love to host a forum or talk group with teens about this topic someday.

David,

I must state for the record, that when I spoke of "Our boys", I was speaking about ALL boys of the world. No matter what race or creed. They are all apart of humanity and all are vulnerable to a deteriorating society, no matter which end of the spectrum they are on. What affects one man, affects another. But I hear ya!

I know of your advocacy and passion. I admire your "gumption" to speak out on the issues concerning the African-American family, local and National politics and the educational system in Detroit, for example. People listen to you and they respect you David.

You will find a way to have your forum. When you do, please invite me. I'd love to sit in. Thanks again, for sharing. S

incerely, Meetta

MY LIFE- RUNNING MY OWN RACE

Yep Reader!

Speaking on the wisdom of my life. Applying that knowledge I've learned over the years about accomplishing tasks. Today, while out running errands and enjoying the day with my son, I found myself encouraging him as I always try to do. He was concerned about some achievements he has yet to make and I was reminded of a lesson I had to learn for myself that fit this very situation.

I had to learn to run my own race at my own pace. I had to realize that based on the skills, abilities and experiences that I have, I run the race of life differently than you may be running it. "The race is not always won by the swift, but by those that endure." Remember "The Tortoise and the Hare" children's story? Some people are running the race of life so fast that they also crash just as fast! Others seem to be moving ahead at a good pace. They have the career, have accomplished dreams, they have money and relationships. But you don't know their story!

You may think you are or it may even look like you are behind those people, but take heart. You may still be working the same job for 20 years don't have much to show for it. You may have had to put dreams on hold, and still don't have the vehicle you really need or want. Yes! You are taking the bus. You may be renting instead of owning...anything! You may not think you have made it yet, but you have to realize something. Sure, there are many who are "ahead" of you according to your standards. There are so many others way behind you! And behind them are still yet others!

There are those who are still standing at the starting block. They haven't even left the gate yet! There may be any number of reasons why, but none-the-less, they haven't made it yet. Maybe they haven't any dreams, any hope or willingness to even try! Maybe they just never thought to have a plan! "A man who lacks vision will perish".

Suppose they feel they have lack support or have not yet learned to encourage themselves! I don't know about them, but as for YOU! Listen to me! Before you beat up on yourself up, realize these things, be grateful for who you are! Be grateful for the skills, gifts and talents that you have and are capable of! Be grateful for the opportunities you have or can create for yourself! Be grateful for the dreams you have and for the time and gift of life that you have to start moving today! Recognize, be grateful, find contentment in yourself! Stop comparing yourself to the Joneses (to other people).

The other thing is, if you really aren't satisfied with where you are, be productive and aggressive in moving towards your goals and set reasonable, ones that you can possibly achieve. But set goals so it is a challenge to you! If it is too easy, you may take it for granted and never get to it! So, Go for it! Get a vision. See yourself doing something positive and becoming something beneficial and productive. Keep running the race at your own pace. You will get there. I believe in you. And from time to time, remember to remind yourself that YOU...ARE A CHAMPION!

RUN your race AT YOUR OWN PACE!

TAKE CARE.

ON THE JOB-WISDOM, IN GIVING

Hey my lovely readers,

How's it going tonight? I hope everything that you needed, you received today!

I really appreciate you reader and I just wanted to gives you well thoughts.

Thanks for joining me again tonight.

This column is where I share wisdom about being on the job, whether you are an employee of high or low ranking. I offer situations that regularly occur in work places all across the world and some thoughts about how they should be handled. Although, I've been working for the better part of 25 years at a variety of places, I've witnessed my share of problems. NO! All of the experiences I speak of are not mine, but they are commonplace on the job. I will admit though that this is an article I have been wanting to write for a long time!

I have something interesting to share with you about one of those peculiar things that happen on the job. Don't worry, I'm not going to say anything you can fight me on, well...some of you might, that's to be expected as I write controversial things. But my thoughts are valid, you'll see! If you want to still fight me on this, then hey! I'm not scared of you! L.O.L. (Laughing out loud).

Moving on. The subject is; giving while on the job. No matter where you give it and whom you give it to, you should know that there is wisdom in giving. Some of you may not have a problem with this, but for many others it is a problem! How to decide when and how to give is a gift of wisdom. Some people have a problem with people who don't give like they think they should! And this happens a lot on the job! There are many reasons why people don't give to every cause. And their reasons don't have to be explained, to you that is!

Though Giving is a biblical principle, it should not be used in a forcible manner nor for self-centered purposes. It should be done in a way that pleases God and beneficial for man. It should be done in wisdom! God is concerned about the motive for giving as well as just the act of giving! He looks at the heart of your giving. Are you giving to earn the favor of someone? Are you giving to show off or to make yourself look good at someone else's expense? For example, are you calling people out that don't give only to ridicule or cause others to ridicule them?

Giving should be done willingly (freely) and cheerfully. It should bring about joy. Concern yourself with yourself in this area! I understand that it is easier to focus on other people than it is to focus on ones self. We are more critical of others and less critical of ourselves, when it should be the other way around! Wisdom also teaches us that even though, we may say, "My giving (acts and ideas of giving) is just between me and God. I don't Care what other people think." The bible says that we should care! Apostle Paul, (one of Jesus Disciples) said, "For we are taking pains to do what is right, not only in the eyes of the Lord, but also in the eyes of man."

2 Corinthians Ch. 8:21. (2 Corinthians Chapter 8 verse 21)

Anyway, A wise man wrote "If you give all you have without taking account for what you are giving into, and why you are giving, you can give yourself into poverty." Biblically speaking, if you give with a cheerful heart in righteousness and in wisdom, you will receive more from God than what you could ever give. And not just in material things. But for many people, when they give at work or anywhere else, it has nothing to do with biblical principle. But you can't escape biblical principle! So its right to teach about motives and wisdom in giving. Sometimes people are giving or collecting to prove a point or get something in return. Again, the subject of motive comes up. So, I ask this question, when you give, WHAT IS YOUR MOTIVE FOR GIVING?

And what is your motive for wanting people to give into something you planned?

With so many people on your job, the celebrations and events can be so numerous that giving becomes the topic of trouble. I am speaking in regards to retirements, baby showers, birthdays, graduations, funerals, and anniversaries, just to name a few things. Inevitably the requests or money and gifts always follow these events as celebrated by co-workers. Sometimes, the requests feel more lie a demand or an expectation. It shouldn't be like that and that is where the problem often arises!

Many people who can afford to give and don't have a problem with giving so freely, should still be very mindful and respectful of those people who don't give! Maybe they don't' want to give. Maybe they can't afford to keep giving all the time, even if you only ask for a $5.00 donation! And remember, the people that you are asking, it is their money NOT YOURS! BE RESPECTFUL. Think about this. What if 100 requests for donations came through in a years time. Each person would be expected to give $500.00 of their money! Even if you ask for $1.00, it's not your call to make! You don't know what they need their money for. You don't know, why they are working and claiming that paycheck every week etc.. I've been made aware that there are people on different jobs that have been heard saying something very shocking that I have to write about! "Look at these people line up for their paychecks, I can just leave mine sitting. Heck, I don't have to cash mine for days." and "I've forgotten about my check for weeks at a time and didn't even miss it." and "I don't really need the money, I just work because I wanted something to do." But these people (inconsiderates) are often telling this to people on the job, who REALLY need the money! Many of these people work with minimum wage earners, so how dare they! So, I know their views about money differ than many others and this can affect the peace on a job.

While there may be many on the job who are much more well off, we have to keep in mind that a majority of people are working BECAUSE THEY NEED THEIR PAYCHECKS! There are many people who are even working on low-wage paying jobs that seriously can't handle all of the requests for their money to go towards gift requests on the job. The job is not the only place they have to spend their money! Whatever the pay scale, everyone should be respected about giving. They shouldn't be made to feel bad because they don't give every time they are asked! In giving, as in many other things, everyone should be recognized for making the decision themselves. You don't the right to make that decision for them! And in case no one told you, it is unreasonable to expect people to give on demand all of the time whether they can afford to or not!

There are different situations that surround giving on the job that can stir up trouble. I've been in a situation where new people are on the job and don't feel comfortable giving because they may not know the person. Others still may not get along with that or are interested in giving to that particular event. Christmas is coming up and everyone doesn't participate in such celebrations, and your office may be having "Secret Santa". I know for a fact that on my job, there are people of all different religious beliefs and some don't celebrate birthdays or Christmas. If you are one of the collectors for such job events, let me ask you this question; Have you ever taken the time to find that out when you ask people to give for these occasions?

Do you respect their answer and take the pressure off of them?

Working with people successfully is surrounded by creating harmony on the job.

Does how you act when it comes to giving on the job, help to create such harmony?

How do you act when someone would rather not participate. Do you take them into it? Do you pressure them? What do you do then? In that instance and in any other situations where requests of donations or gifts are turned down, it should be respected, treated kindly and it should be OK with everybody else!

Now yes! You may say, "Well they don't have to give if it is an issue." All I can say is, that is very noble of you, but watch how you say it! Check the attitude that may be following that statement. See, I've heard that a few times on the job and I've even heard the attitudes and the crap that is spread. It's unnecessary and childish. It often results in unnecessary problems between co-workers like outcasting people or dragging them down with gossip. And really it's not your business why they don't give! Many times the event that was being planned for, ended up coming between people on the job. It cause tension and the person was supposed to be celebrating, usually was oblivious to the fact, meaning it didn't matter to them anyway that everyone didn't give. Usually they were just happy for what they did get from those that chose to give! Please remember, it's not abut you! Just concern yourself with your giving, don't' cause unnecessary problems with your co-workers over this and enjoy the festivities.

REMEMBER!

Meetta