MEETTA'S READERS - YOUR CONCERN FOR ME!

HELLO READERS!

Many of you are very amazing in sharing your compassion for me, especially about what I've been sharing of my life, as of late. Others of you think I should be ashamed for what I wrote of my abuse as a child and how it has affected my life. I say to you, May peace find you and remain. May it free you from your own personal prison. May the blinders of your hearts and minds come off and you shall see clearly once again or for the first time.

As for me, I will not wear the chains of shame EVER again! My blinders are off and burned. If you truly know me, or have ever been in my company as a friend or foe, then you can attest to the fact that I walk and stand with my head held high. I hold eye contact and I also speak in a loud, clear voice. There is no shame in me as a victim of abuse. So, don't expect it!

As for the compassionate writers of concern for the personal stories and soul bearing poetry that I share on my blog sight, I say AGAIN...THANK YOU! Thank you, for taking time out to write me sharing your compassion, words of concern and wisdom. May my soul bearing, be a gifting to someone else to encourage them to fight for their freedom, their peace of mind, their restored Joy, their dignity and their self worth. May they find their voice!

*This is a Re-post from 3/13/2011

Some of you are very caring and open with your concern for me. I appreciate you.

You have expressed your concern, in light of what I have been moved to share on this site in a variety of Biblical Scriptures, personal stories and poems over the years. Some of you have shown great compassion by saying

"Be careful Meetta, Be careful in what you write and share."

You have said this "because people can be cruel. And somebody, somewhere, in their misery is always lurking about to take something of someone else's and use it against them, even that which is meant for good purposes."

I SAY IN RESPONSE:

THANK YOU Dear readers and friends. Those of you who have taken the time to share your compassion with me. But please do not think me unwise for being bold and courageous enough to use some of my own life to empower others. I have "wise counsel". I have used and will continue to use great wisdom and discernment with what I share. I am not a babe just born and stumbling through this life. If there is something I don't have a peace about sharing, I won't. If there is something I have written and need to retract, I will retract it.

As far as the personal stories I share, I have spent my whole childhood and young adult years living in shame because of what someone else did and said. It had control of me. But I've come to learn over the course of my life, "Whom the Lord sets free is free indeed". Concerned Reader, I WILL NOT LET THE MISERY OF OTHERS PUT ME IN THOSE CHAINS AGAIN!

By the same token, If someone takes ANYTHING I say here, and try and use it against me, then the battle becomes between them and the Lord Jesus Christ! I am a Christ Child. I am a believer and follower of Christ Jesus, even in and because of, all my flaws. But I am striving. The bottom line is, I have accepted Jesus as the Lord of my life. I have put my life into his hands. So for that, He will "raise up a standard against the enemy" on my behalf. Lord! May God help them, because what I share, is for the purpose of building others up and that they may have Godly peace and healing in their lives. It is my hope that they use what they read here, in my life stories and come to know Jesus and God for themselves! So, if someone comes against me for righteousness sake, then the Lord will protect me. Just as he has protected me all these years from letting the ways of this world destroy me.

It was determined for my life, by the Grace of God, that not only should I survive the madness that was bestowed against me, but that I should become a victor over it! Not only for my benefit, but to the benefit of others and ultimately to the glory of God. I thank God for his new mercies and protection by acknowledging him openly, through sharing my stories and strength. So, I say Again...

I will not let the misery of others determine the direction of my life.

But I hear you all!

"People will gossip, even whisper behind your back discussing you!". As it has been both told to me and something I've experienced for myself. They will even go so far as to sneak around you to find out more about you to talk about! I've dealt with that before too!

For example, someone at work who was nosey like that was lurking around me and a buddy during a lunchtime conversation. This person just kept easing around us trying to hear what they could hear. Knowing full well they didn't care about either one of us otherwise! People do that kind of stuff all the time!

Some people even get to the point that they end up putting alot of energy into you andyour stuff! Even reveling in your pain and misfortune. Sometimes I get frustrated about why some people don't get that they can experience the same healing power and freedom that Jesus promises and continues to perform in others lives! Gods power can out weigh any problem or stronghold that you have.

But Misery...loves company and it doesn't care who it uses to get that company! And it's never satisfied. So it keeps seeking. It's fights back hard, fooling people into thinking they are OK! That they don't have to change because the problem is not with them! That the problem is

with everybody else! Which is all a lie, because not one person on this earth is completely free of flaws and things that cannot be made better in them! Nevertheless,

In spite of and despite misery's attacks, I will press on in the work encouraging on my blog site. And f

or the sake of easing your mind with the purpose of sharing like I do here, with you all, please read the following.

Acts 4 :3-4

"They seized Peter and John, and because it was evening, they put them in jail until the next day. But many who heard the message believed and the number of men grew to about five thousand."

FOOTNOTES

ACTS 4:3-4

"Seldom will sharing the gospel send us to jail as it did Peter and John. Still, we run the risk in trying to win others to Christ. We might be willing to face a night in jail if it would bring 5,000 people to Christ, but shouldn't we also be willing to suffer for the sake of even one?

What do you risk in witnessing--Rejections, persecution?

Whatever the risks, realize that nothing done for God is ever wasted."

I love you Dear Readers for your concern.

It brings Joy to my heart, a smile to my face and tears to my eyes.

THANK YOU ever so much!

May the Peace and Grace of God be forever upon you!

May he honor your concern, for even me.

Meetta J. Martin

MEETTA TALKS ~ GIFT GIVING, Part 1

HEY, EVERYBODY!

Well maybe just hello to the one reader whose reading today as this is CHRISTMAS DAY, considering, many others are busy with their holiday plans. Smile!

I had plans too, but they got squashed. I found myself with my son scampering to create new plans at the last minute! And actually in the midst of our day, something ELSE HAPPENED! And even though I just got home, threw my coat on the back of my desk chair, typing while sitting with one boot on, I felt compelled to get right on it. I wanted to let you know all of the wonderful details. But first, I need to write about gift giving. That's right!

See, as this is Christmas, there are undoubtedly many smiling faces of people who have swapped more material gifts than any other time of the year, for most.

People have different ideas about gift giving.

Though there are many of you who have both received and or given gifts, there are many people who don't participate in gift exchange for one reason or another. There are also those among us who are alone, sad, lonely, sick, forgotten and all else who may did not receive anything! There are also people who have seemingly everything, family, friends, a spouse, caring children, money, employment, and material wealth, but they have no real joy. They may not even fully understand the real meaning of giving or receiving, for that matter! There are also people who are poor financially but have A TON of joy which brings me to one a particularly special kind of gift!

Joy is a gift from God. He was the first gift giver!

Joy is a gift that is given freely and available to all who seek and grab hold to it!

God is no respecter of person! Meaning, what he makes available to one, he makes available to another.

Joy is a gift that means even when things are not going well, you can find peace, strength, gratitude and the hope that things will get better while yet holding on during tough situations. Joyful people are so grateful for even the little they may have, that they often very willing to freely share it with others, with no quest of a return. Joyful people often smile when it seems there isn't much to smile about. They know how to laugh! And can often find something harmless to laugh about. Their joy, (which surpasses happiness) is noticeable, infectious, uplifting, also frustrating, crazy and confusing to some around them. Their joy is frustrating, crazy and or confusing to some because those people are bound. Bound by joyless-ness, misery, criticism and or jealousy just to name a few. Instead of trying to find out how to obtain Joy themselves, they get wound up over someone elses' joy. Often times trying to "rain on their parade. "Misery loves company". I don't know the wise person who said that, but I've found it to be very, very true!

Gift giving.

Yes! There are many, many people who give, especially during this particular season. There are many givers, and many, many more receivers. But how are they giving and in what attitude are they receiving?...is the topic of this piece.

Gift giving is an important subject especially during this time of year! Considering life and time is precious, people spend much time out of their lives in long lines at the departments stores returning gifts they've received!

Like I said before, the attitude of giving and receiving gifts is the topic of this piece.

For one thing, many people give gifts to appease rather than to make someone happy by fulfilling desires or meeting needs. The gift giving appeaser, appease themselves or the receiver of the gift. Often times, in this kind of situation, the gift wasn't necessarily given because the giver really wanted to give this person something in the first place! Many people give gifts to people who they would not normally give a gift to for different reasons including guilt, obligation, shame, pity or to ease either their minds, the receiver or the mind of a third party. I call such gifts "token gifts". Token gifts because often times, they really don't mean anything, especially to the giver! For one thing, there was not much effort in the choosing of the gift. For another thing, you can just about feel the pressure of obligation behind this sort of gift giving!

Please know these "token gifts", gifts given in this manner, usually don't fool the receiver of the gift! In my experience, I have felt I have received such gifts. They usually are items that let me know this person has no idea of an appropriate gift for me. Just a "little something" they picked up. The gift has nothing to do with me, my likes, my interests or need for example. The gift doesn't reflect me in anyway! Which means there was no "real thought" of whether I would enjoy the gift or not. It's not about price value. It's about the spirit in which a gift is given and the thought behind it. As we say, " It's the thought that counts!" It truly, truly is!

Usually people use that last phrase, "It's the thought that counts", in defense. Yet not fully understanding that that saying also defends both the positive and negative thoughts behind the gift giving! Yes! It is the thought that counts! Even when there is little or no thought put into it!

I've received more than my share of miniature body and bath items, random gift items, and useless trinkets. Usually times I have found myself re- gifting such items back out, but as part of a larger package! If it wasn't for my son wanting to keep one such gift this Christmas, I would have re-gifted it back out too! Reader, I don't know how you feel about receiving token gifts, with little sentiment in them, but I for one HATE TOKEN GIFTS! There is not real heartfelt thought behind or in them! They really only inform the receiver that they were thought very little of. A joyful person myself, I personally don't need that kind of sentiment! It's also difficult to be grateful for such gifts. I usually just let the moment pass after receiving them. So, save your money and effort on token gifts for me!

Do you see how much more complicated gift giving can be?

It is made more complicated by the useless, wasteful spending, time and effort it can take!

I don't get it! See, I'm not a person who needs to receive return for the gifts I give anyway! The people who "truly" know me, know that about me! I give gifts, taking into account the person I am giving it to. I don't believe that you should give a gift that you wouldn't like to receive yourself. At least care about the quality of the gift you are giving! I'm not a mind reader, so my gifts aren't always perfect, but I watch and I listen. I pay attention! As intelligent as the "token" gift giver may not know that I am, I am actually quite intelligent! I try to give thoughtful gifts if I'm going to take the time, effort and money to give one. And I also know a thoughtful gift when I receive one. Don't you?

See, take me for example and then we'll get to what had me rushing back to the house to write this article int eh first place. Because most of you don't know me, I telling you this only to acquaint you with what kind of person I am and not to brag. Just so you can get an understanding, OK?

See, when it comes to giving to others, I give from the kindness and true love and concern in my heart! I don't have to know you to give unto you. If I feel compelled to give, more often than not, I will give and not just material things (because I don't always have that to give). And gifts are not limited to material items!

I for one have received the best gifts, being gifts of emotion. And I have spent much energy, words of encouragement and even tears in prayer. And int he case of material things and emotion, I have given to my own hurt. I've been known to give out of my need, depriving my self initially. In a few of those cases I have suffered but "time heals all things" and eventually I came out of top of things. Again, I say this to help you understand me, not to brag. Nothing to brag about. Kindness, compassion and giving are not new things!

STAY TUNED FOR Part 2 of "Meetta Talks"

and what had me rushing home to write to you on this Christmas Day, 2010!

MEETTA TALKS ~ GIFT GIVING, Last Pt. 2

Welcome back!

Thanks for continuing to read, "Gift Giving"

...So with that said, I give you this example. A couple of months ago, I was riding the bus in the city to run an errand. As the bus stopped near a hospital to pick up other passengers, a young lady with a baby got on. It seemed from the conversation with the bus driver that she was having, she didn't have all of the needed fair. She also looked very tired. After a few moments, the driver decided to let her take her seat.

As she sat, I couldn't help but look at her and as as I did, I thought about myself as a young mother in my early twenties. Turns out, I also was moved into the world of single parenthood and it felt like I was carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders right along with carrying that baby. I thought about how much of a relief it was for me when I had a shoulder to lean on, when somebody (anybody) showed me a little kindness during my rough moments as young struggling mother. As I watched her and her baby, I noticed her appearance, and they weren't dressed int eh best clothes but they were clean and neat. The baby seemed content. She wasn't crying. She seemed cared for and at peace. But it was the young mothers face that caught my attention the most. She looked worried and wearied. She reminded me SO MUCH of myself in those days. My heart opened wide for her and if I had a million dollars, at that moment, she would have been a partial heir to what I had.

As the bus continued to move on, I watched very carefully to see what she was to get off, in case she got of before me. I had made up in my mind to do something to be a blessing to her. A blessing is a gift you had nothing to done nothing to earn. It is a gift tat is given freely. At no charge. With that, there is no debt to repay!

I didn't have a million dollars. I had no words of wisdom to give quickly on that crowded bus. I had no insight into that young lady's life to be of any real lasting help. I only that moment! What was I going to do with it. The more I watched that young woman, it cam to me. Eureka, I had it! I gave in emotionally and let my heart open wide. I let prayer began to rise silently within me for her had her child and the situation and people that caused her to look so worried, so worn . I also wanted to give her a tangible blessing, something that she could touch that would be of some use. But how to do that discreetly on a crowded bus so as not to bring unwanted attention to her. But she was sitting in the very front of this crowded bus! "How do I do it?", I thought.

I grew anxious the longer the ride went on, not knowing when she would get off. And then, as I fast approached my stop, I knew exactly how I would handle this. My son was with me and we got up, I pushed my way to the front and as I passed by her, for some reason she focused me which made it easier to do what I knew I had to do. I had money balled up in my had and pushed it gently down into the hand she was holding the baby with, and said in a low discreet tone, "God bless and keep you". She smiled slightly, never opened her hand and off the bus I went.

It all went by so quickly, but "operation success"! My heart was racing so fast! WOW! What a rush! It was so amazing to be of such a blessing. To have a stranger whom you will never see again, take notice of you in such a way! I don't now that that young girl thought, or what it did for her faith, hope, or situation, but for me...it reminded me that I, that we are all her meant to do what I did...what many others did and continue to do. And that is just to simply to care! Care about people! Give and do what you can to be of some positive use and it is best to do so without regard for what you will receive in return. Take heart. Inside of the fact that it is written int eh bible that "The eyes f the Lord are in every place, he watches on thewicked and the good" and "When you give to the poor, you lend unto the Lord."...The Lord will repay".

Inside of those promises, you also create a situation for a profound positive affect to take place in someones life. How amazing it is to bring joy and hope into even a strangers life, perhaps positively affecting their destiny and mindset for ever! See, in the large scope of things, we are all connected whether we know each other personally or not. I told you, I have sometimes given unto my own hurt as I often give as I am compelled to give, even without regard for return. Recently I gave Holiday gifts, one in spite of. It cost me $35.00, more than I should have paid for it on my part-time salary at the moment, but I felt compelled to give this particular gift anyway. It was one such gift I was advised not to give, because it was not thought the recipient of it would appreciate my thoughtfulness. (The adviser didn't' want my feelings to get hurt.) But I gave it anyway and received an unnecessary "token gift" in return. Again, I give out of love, and thoughtfulness with no regard for return. Actually, the fact that I gave it was a test for me! All the same, just as "evil begets evil" so does kindness beget kindness, eventually! And you NEVER KNOW exactly where that kindness will come from! That reminds me of something I said in part 1 of this article and it's time to clarify.

So, onto what had me rushing back to the house tonight to write to you about!

As my son and I seem to find ourselves pretty much just the two of us on most holidays including Christmas, we went about our day with gusto. We didn't' complain about not having alot of places to choose to go to. We didn't complain about not having that loving and joyful big family we so me much desire. Instead we opened our presents to each other and from others. We enjoyed our breakfast. We laughed ALOT! So much so, my son was crying! (YEAH YEAH, GOD IS GREAT! GOD IS GOOD! We laughed so. (smile, smile) PRAISE GOD!

We played some of my sons new games. NO matter how old he gets, we play family games games because it keeps us spending quality time, while providing fun and more moments to laugh, talk and talk some more! We like good games like Jenga, Connect four, "Scene It", Sorry, Mancala, etc.) In any case, we were determined to get out of the house and enjoy the day, we wanted to the movie theater and out to dinner. We were going to go to a few other places, but travel was difficult as we take the bus and the buses were running terrible today.

I was tired form working 6 nights straight and one full day shift, then the cold set in with the ending of the day.

So we just went to pick up dinner, as I have been very busy lately with work and all and opted not to prepare a fancy big dinner again, just for two of us. So we went to a nearby sit down restaurant. We ordered take out, my son started not to feel well. When I went to pay the cashier, with money out in my hand, the cashier told me, (I think he was the manager) "Oh, you're all set" I asked him what did he mean and he said, "your dinner has already been paid for" I asked him how? who? and he told me and my son both. "I was told to say it was a random person. I saw him punch in the numbers and get the receipt. He said "seriously, don't worry about it, your dinner for the both of you is all set. And by the way, you get a desert and a drink if you like." Have a drink while you wait, a coffee to warm up ?" Oh my! My son and I were so grateful explaining to the man that it was much appreciated. I wanted him to know how sad I had started to feel not having this Christmas turn out like my heart desired and how this act of kindness really helped to reinforce my joy! That blessed gift from God. The man came around from the counter, right over to our table and listened to us for that moment. WOW! That man didn't know, that my son and I both are great appreciators of such compassion. That it would leave a mark of lasting appreciation on our lives. Thought the moment may have been short lived for that cashier, it is not for my son and I. We won't forget such kindness on on a such a day as it happened on CHRISTMAS DAY in particular!

Brad, my son was SO impressed that he asked the cashier his name and told him how he would not forget his kindness in both passing the news about our blessed Christmas Dinner"onto us and how he treated us both. With great dignity and compassion. The man was a joy! He was as much delighted to pass on the news to us of our "Christmas Angel" and listen to our brief story of how this act of kindness helped better our Christmas receiving our "Christmas dinner blessing".

Though we have been the recipients of much kindness in our lives, Brad my son, still said that the way that this happened to us , was like the sort of thing you see play out in a movie. As I'm getting laid off from my job in a few days, and have yet to land another one that is appropriate for me, money is short. Though our initial order was less than $20.00, What we ended up with was well over $20.00! We ate well. I didn't have to cook a holiday meal after working so much lately. We didn't concern ourselves whose holiday dinner we didn't get invited to. And now I can do something else with my few dollars. See, GOD KNOWS EVERYTHING! And "He will supply ALL YOUR NEEDS according to HIS riches and glory!" Amen

Dear Reader,

Though Christmas Day is just about over, don't' let you spirit of gift giving be over too! Remember, gift giving is NOT just about giving material things! There are more important things to give and these things you don't have to pay for and the supply is endless.

Understand, somebody will always need "the gift" of a kind word, a hug, a listening ear, a "real" friend, "true"love (the kind that doesn't disappear when you get mad or decide you don't like the person anymore). There will always be someone who needs your skills, talents, gifting, your networking contacts, professional services, knowledge and wisdom. Yes! There will also always be someone who needs even material things in their time of need, including a decent paying jog, a home of their own, and a vehicle to make their lives easier. Don't wait another 365 days to get involved in gift giving.

Though it's late, 11:48 pm actually,

I STILL HAVE TIME TO TELL YOU ALL,

Merry Christmas!

And never think your giving no matter how "random" ,

is wasted! God Bless!

Meetta

FOR WOMEN ONLY! -Be content with self!

Hey, My Sister Girls!

"Though we are not related, nor have we met,

but we are all connected by humanity, no matter what our Race, Creed or Culture."~ Meetta J. Martin

In this column, I share with you words of encouragement through personal experiences of my own as well as from others close to me. The hope is that you may be encouraged by and grow from these stories. Many of the things, you may have already experienced. Hopefully, you too will find inspiration and solace in my writings. If you read something that inspires you and you have a google account, feel free to comment on this site or you can contact me by e-mail. My e-mail address is in the heading of this page.

Sister Girls, it's been a long time since we last had our chat. I believe the last one was around Mothers' day. And I apologize for not keeping up. So much has happened. Funny thing is, I can't even remember it all! It's amazing how things seem SOOOO IMPORTANT when they are happening and when they are over, I've seem to have forgotten what all the hoopla was about! I can tell you this though, the subject matter of men and women has come up a few times during these last few months and I have something to share with you. First, you should know that I am one of those women that has learned a lot from her experiences and I don't take them lightly. I defend the woman. WOMEN ARE VALUABLE AND SPECIAL AND WE SHOULD BE TREATED AS SUCH! Unfortunately though, many of us women don't know our own worth! Sometimes, I am so strong in my opinion that I have irritated people, usually men, and dependent women because they can't separate me from my strong beliefs on this subject. If I think a lesson is worthwhile, being helpful to someone as in this case of self-esteem, no matter how controversial, I will share it!

I've learned a lot in my life of being a single woman, never married and over the age of 40. I've been challenged a great deal, especially when it comes to how I have been viewed! I've had to be strong, an independent thinker, self-motivator, multi-tasker, bill payer, head-of household, including being my sons primary source for guidance, direction and nurturing, provision, a confidant, and yes the disciplinarian. Raising a boy to be a man as woman alone and on my own most of the time, its been a tough road!

Many people in the past, have expressed concern (And hope) for me to be found by that one special person who comes and changes my life for the better with "True" Friendship, undeniable Love, acceptance, support and then marriage. But you know, I don't how that will happen, but hey I'm open! In the meantime though, still finding contentment in my life as it is. Also still striving to BE BETTER, do better and go after those thing I REALLY want and see myself doing. Even if no one else does! In light of this, Ladies I want to share this piece of wisdom that never grows old for me.

..."Don't look for YOUR joy or happiness in anyone else! Don't seek nor allow another person be the primary source for these things for you! Be content with yourself first!" If someone special comes into your life, (a mate, or a new friend for example) their job is to ADD to your life. They are to add positivity to the positive way you already view yourself and what's happening in your life. They are not to be the primary source for your happiness!

Don't allow yourself to become dependent on someone else to provide that for you! That's a tough job, a heavy burden that no one has the ability to perform successfully without a great deal of pain. Putting your complete happiness in someone else and expecting them to be responsible for you in this way, is not fair to them! Besides, you can't control people! And if you try, you are only asking for trouble. We each have our own minds! We're human and humans are flawed! We often let each other down by either the choices we make, things we say or do!

FIND CONTENTMENT IN YOUR OWN LIFE! Then, that which you desire will be attracted to that light! Usually, no one who is healthy of mind, self-esteem and character, is going to want an emotionally dependent person, primarily relying on them for joy, happiness or completion. I've personally been on both sides of that situation. When I was more dependent and less self assured, (back in the day) I got my feelings hurt! As I begun to grow more self assured and finding Joy for myself, I ran into the problem of weak men looking to hook up with me because they admired my strength! They said things like, "If I had a strong woman like you, I would be a better man. I would be alright. I would be able to achieve things." My response would be, "Why can't you become a better man, be alright and go achieve things before you talk to me? No productive woman who cares about herself and trying to achieve things is going to want a dependent, clingy man dragging her down." And Women, that's the way a lot of men think too! I said it once already, twice I think, Now I'll say it again,

"BE CONTENT WITH SELF, FIRST!"

THANKS FOR READING "

"FOR WOMEN ONLY."