MEETTA'S READERS - YOUR CONCERN FOR ME!

HELLO READERS!

Many of you are very amazing in sharing your compassion for me, especially about what I've been sharing of my life, as of late. Others of you think I should be ashamed for what I wrote of my abuse as a child and how it has affected my life. I say to you, May peace find you and remain. May it free you from your own personal prison. May the blinders of your hearts and minds come off and you shall see clearly once again or for the first time.

As for me, I will not wear the chains of shame EVER again! My blinders are off and burned. If you truly know me, or have ever been in my company as a friend or foe, then you can attest to the fact that I walk and stand with my head held high. I hold eye contact and I also speak in a loud, clear voice. There is no shame in me as a victim of abuse. So, don't expect it!

As for the compassionate writers of concern for the personal stories and soul bearing poetry that I share on my blog sight, I say AGAIN...THANK YOU! Thank you, for taking time out to write me sharing your compassion, words of concern and wisdom. May my soul bearing, be a gifting to someone else to encourage them to fight for their freedom, their peace of mind, their restored Joy, their dignity and their self worth. May they find their voice!

*This is a Re-post from 3/13/2011

Some of you are very caring and open with your concern for me. I appreciate you.

You have expressed your concern, in light of what I have been moved to share on this site in a variety of Biblical Scriptures, personal stories and poems over the years. Some of you have shown great compassion by saying

"Be careful Meetta, Be careful in what you write and share."

You have said this "because people can be cruel. And somebody, somewhere, in their misery is always lurking about to take something of someone else's and use it against them, even that which is meant for good purposes."

I SAY IN RESPONSE:

THANK YOU Dear readers and friends. Those of you who have taken the time to share your compassion with me. But please do not think me unwise for being bold and courageous enough to use some of my own life to empower others. I have "wise counsel". I have used and will continue to use great wisdom and discernment with what I share. I am not a babe just born and stumbling through this life. If there is something I don't have a peace about sharing, I won't. If there is something I have written and need to retract, I will retract it.

As far as the personal stories I share, I have spent my whole childhood and young adult years living in shame because of what someone else did and said. It had control of me. But I've come to learn over the course of my life, "Whom the Lord sets free is free indeed". Concerned Reader, I WILL NOT LET THE MISERY OF OTHERS PUT ME IN THOSE CHAINS AGAIN!

By the same token, If someone takes ANYTHING I say here, and try and use it against me, then the battle becomes between them and the Lord Jesus Christ! I am a Christ Child. I am a believer and follower of Christ Jesus, even in and because of, all my flaws. But I am striving. The bottom line is, I have accepted Jesus as the Lord of my life. I have put my life into his hands. So for that, He will "raise up a standard against the enemy" on my behalf. Lord! May God help them, because what I share, is for the purpose of building others up and that they may have Godly peace and healing in their lives. It is my hope that they use what they read here, in my life stories and come to know Jesus and God for themselves! So, if someone comes against me for righteousness sake, then the Lord will protect me. Just as he has protected me all these years from letting the ways of this world destroy me.

It was determined for my life, by the Grace of God, that not only should I survive the madness that was bestowed against me, but that I should become a victor over it! Not only for my benefit, but to the benefit of others and ultimately to the glory of God. I thank God for his new mercies and protection by acknowledging him openly, through sharing my stories and strength. So, I say Again...

I will not let the misery of others determine the direction of my life.

But I hear you all!

"People will gossip, even whisper behind your back discussing you!". As it has been both told to me and something I've experienced for myself. They will even go so far as to sneak around you to find out more about you to talk about! I've dealt with that before too!

For example, someone at work who was nosey like that was lurking around me and a buddy during a lunchtime conversation. This person just kept easing around us trying to hear what they could hear. Knowing full well they didn't care about either one of us otherwise! People do that kind of stuff all the time!

Some people even get to the point that they end up putting alot of energy into you andyour stuff! Even reveling in your pain and misfortune. Sometimes I get frustrated about why some people don't get that they can experience the same healing power and freedom that Jesus promises and continues to perform in others lives! Gods power can out weigh any problem or stronghold that you have.

But Misery...loves company and it doesn't care who it uses to get that company! And it's never satisfied. So it keeps seeking. It's fights back hard, fooling people into thinking they are OK! That they don't have to change because the problem is not with them! That the problem is

with everybody else! Which is all a lie, because not one person on this earth is completely free of flaws and things that cannot be made better in them! Nevertheless,

In spite of and despite misery's attacks, I will press on in the work encouraging on my blog site. And f

or the sake of easing your mind with the purpose of sharing like I do here, with you all, please read the following.

Acts 4 :3-4

"They seized Peter and John, and because it was evening, they put them in jail until the next day. But many who heard the message believed and the number of men grew to about five thousand."

FOOTNOTES

ACTS 4:3-4

"Seldom will sharing the gospel send us to jail as it did Peter and John. Still, we run the risk in trying to win others to Christ. We might be willing to face a night in jail if it would bring 5,000 people to Christ, but shouldn't we also be willing to suffer for the sake of even one?

What do you risk in witnessing--Rejections, persecution?

Whatever the risks, realize that nothing done for God is ever wasted."

I love you Dear Readers for your concern.

It brings Joy to my heart, a smile to my face and tears to my eyes.

THANK YOU ever so much!

May the Peace and Grace of God be forever upon you!

May he honor your concern, for even me.

Meetta J. Martin

B.I.B.L.E.-Instruction Manual FOR US, Pt. 1

Dear Reader,

Good Morning!

Welcome to Basic Instruction Before Leaving Earth. (B.I.B.L.E.).

We, as a society have accepted that there are instruction manuals for how-to projects like laying new tile on the floor or shower, how to work the I-pads, how to build a house or how to put a baby's stroller together, but many of us never thought (or have accepted) that there is a manual for human beings! If you want to be enlightened on this fact, this column is what you want to read!

In my B.I B.L.E. column, is where I show you the mysteries surrounding the truth that THERE IS A MANUAL that teaches the basic principles on how to be a better human being on all levels.

For example, this manual can teach you how to be a better parent, a better neighbor, a better husband, wife for instance. The manual I refer to, gives insight as to how to deal with every problem that you can imagine that would come your way or effect somebody else! As an illustration leading to proof of my point, let me ask you a few questions first.

1. Do you need to know how to properly deal with an enemy?

2. Are you having trouble in your marriage?

3. Do you have questions about Child rearing?

4. Do you have questions about whether or not God truly exist?

5. Do you have questions about Jesus' existence?

6. What are missionaries and why do we need them?

7. Do you have questions about Homosexuality,

if it is a spiritually correct and peaceful way of life?

8. Do you struggle with helping the poor and others in need?

9. Do you struggle with loneliness?

10. Do you struggle with lust, sexual issues?

11. Do you have questions about death?

Whether or not those specific questions directly effect you, I am going to show you that it is these types of every day concerns we find ourselves in need of help with! Remember, whether I described a problem that you are having or not having, there are SO MANY issues that we face, that I can't possibly write them all down! So, with those few questions as examples, I am trying to show you my main point. That there is an all encompassing manual that is set high and far beyond any manual or book that even Dr. Seuss could ever have written as to how we can live fully and successfully! I'm not talking about your average how to book touching on a single subject like finances or marriage. I am talking about the Holy Bible!

The Holy bible has been translated in hundreds of languages, in every widely used language known to man. Though many critics say meaning certainly has been lost, based on ancient biblical scroll studies, the basics of the Holy Bible still continues to prove to be most effective. It is still the most powerful and effective manual for human kind that there ever was! Because we have free wills, we have proven to have fickle behavior (even many of us who profess Christ). Even though we may change with the wind, the basic principles of Gods divinely inspired word has not changed and never will!

Now, as I have not forgotten the questions I've asked you, let me show you where you can begin to find the answers. Warning! Considering the kind of world we live in, these answers may not be pleasing to you, someone you know and respect. Many answers I show also won't come in agreement with what the world dictates! (I Thank God that he is wiser and more knowledgeable than we are!) I also say again that the Holy Bible was basically written with the use of many divinely inspired words by a God who has our best interests at heart.

I'll answer question by question according to the number of the question above. Please keep in mind that some of these topics have many biblical verses to them. I am only going to write out one or two for each question, but I will at least list all of the pertinent verses for you to look up on your own. And as I don't know everything, I have no doubt you may find other biblical verses (not talking about popular sayings, but sound biblical doctrine) on these subjects as well.

1. How to deal with enemies.

Scripture ~

Proverbs 25: 21-22

"If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat;

if he is thirsty, give him water to drink.

In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head and the Lord will reward you.

Footnote: Proverbs 25: 21-22

**I used the Life Application Study Bible, New International Version

Tyndale House publishers, Inc. Wheaton,Illinois

God's form of retaliation is most effective and yet difficult to do. Paul (the writer of the book of Proverbs) quotes this proverb in Romans 12:19-21. In Matthew 5:44, Jesus encourages us to pray for those who hurt us. By returning good for evil, we are acknowledging God as the balancer of all accounts and trusting him to be the judge.

*More verses on enemies

Proverbs 24; 17

Matthew 5:44 (Love your enemies, and pray...)

Luke 6:27 (Love your enemy, do good unto them...)

Psalm 23:5 (In the presence of my enemies...)

......And so on.

STAY TUNED

I WILL BE BACK TO CONTINUE ...

For Women Only ~ MEN too!~ Is Wisdom a "SHE"?

I'm Still talking about the lovely Wisdom. Geez, She is totally amazing!

YES! Wisdom is referred to as a " SHE"! But ladies don't get the big head! Really wisdom "is the mind of God being revealed." It is NOT a separate being! Referring to wisdom as a she "is only a literary device in order to bring wisdom Alive for us!"

Calling wisdom a "she" means that she, just like women is very strong, intelligent, compassionate and sees potential. Women also have the ability to encourage people to do great things by sharing knowledge and causing them to apply it to their lives. Like that, Wisdom has that innate ability to want to help, to nurture, like many of us (usually). Women can also be very, very convincing and creative about how we get our point across.

Though many of us have sincere hearts to help, many other women have been known to use their powers for evil. That's the difference with wisdom! Wisdom will offer her services to help better the situation without need to satisfy self! Many women seducers are only out for their own benefit. They are destructive and cannot be trusted. Wisdom can be trusted completely because she comes from God un-tainted. She comes without desires of her own. She seeks only to be obedient to God, using her powers for good intent.

Everybody, usually this column is for women only, but ladies this particular topic calls for both genders to unite on this one! Knowledge is for everyone! Wisdom is here for all of us. So welcome brothers into our world.

Ladies, my precious Sister Girls, we will go back to our regular column being just for us on next week. Thank you for your patience and allowing the guys in this time. As you know, all this week I've started devoting all of my 12 columns totally to wisdom. I've introduced to you what and who wisdom is. I've written about some of her strong points and why she exists. With wisdom, Understanding can't be too far behind. But did you know that the bible calls Wisdom and Understanding a "SHE"? Let me show you.

SCRIPTURE

Proverbs 8: 1-13

I use the Life Application Study Bible,

N.I.V. (New International Version)

Tyndale House Publisher, Inc.

Wheaton, Illinois

"Does not wisdom call out?

Does not Understanding raise her voice?

On the heights along the way,

where the paths meet, she takes her stand;

beside the gates leading into the city,

at the entrances, she cries out;

I raise my voice, to all mankind.

You who are foolish, gain understanding.

Listen, for I have worthy things to say;

I open my lips to speak what is right.

My mouth speaks what is true, for my lips detest wickedness.

All the words of my mouth are just;

none of them is crooked or perverse.

To the discerning all of them are right; they are faultless to those who have knowledge.

Choose my instruction instead of sliver,

knowledge rather than choice gold, for wisdom, is more precious than rubies,

and nothing you desire can compare with her."

FOOTNOTES

Proverbs 8:1

(V. 1) Wisdom's call is contrasted to the call of the adulteress in Chapter 7. Wisdom is portrayed as a woman who guides us (Proverbs 8:1-13) and makes us succeed (proverbs 8:14-21).

Wisdom was present at the creation and works with the Creator (8:22-31). God approves of those who listen to wisdom's counsel (8:32-35). Those who hate wisdom love death (8: 36). Wisdom should affect every aspect of one's life, from beginning to end. Be sure to open all corners of your life to God's direction and guidance.

Hey, I hope this helps you Dear Reader to know more about wisdom

and why you should embrace her.

Meetta

FOR WOMEN ONLY! -Be content with self!

Hey, My Sister Girls!

"Though we are not related, nor have we met,

but we are all connected by humanity, no matter what our Race, Creed or Culture."~ Meetta J. Martin

In this column, I share with you words of encouragement through personal experiences of my own as well as from others close to me. The hope is that you may be encouraged by and grow from these stories. Many of the things, you may have already experienced. Hopefully, you too will find inspiration and solace in my writings. If you read something that inspires you and you have a google account, feel free to comment on this site or you can contact me by e-mail. My e-mail address is in the heading of this page.

Sister Girls, it's been a long time since we last had our chat. I believe the last one was around Mothers' day. And I apologize for not keeping up. So much has happened. Funny thing is, I can't even remember it all! It's amazing how things seem SOOOO IMPORTANT when they are happening and when they are over, I've seem to have forgotten what all the hoopla was about! I can tell you this though, the subject matter of men and women has come up a few times during these last few months and I have something to share with you. First, you should know that I am one of those women that has learned a lot from her experiences and I don't take them lightly. I defend the woman. WOMEN ARE VALUABLE AND SPECIAL AND WE SHOULD BE TREATED AS SUCH! Unfortunately though, many of us women don't know our own worth! Sometimes, I am so strong in my opinion that I have irritated people, usually men, and dependent women because they can't separate me from my strong beliefs on this subject. If I think a lesson is worthwhile, being helpful to someone as in this case of self-esteem, no matter how controversial, I will share it!

I've learned a lot in my life of being a single woman, never married and over the age of 40. I've been challenged a great deal, especially when it comes to how I have been viewed! I've had to be strong, an independent thinker, self-motivator, multi-tasker, bill payer, head-of household, including being my sons primary source for guidance, direction and nurturing, provision, a confidant, and yes the disciplinarian. Raising a boy to be a man as woman alone and on my own most of the time, its been a tough road!

Many people in the past, have expressed concern (And hope) for me to be found by that one special person who comes and changes my life for the better with "True" Friendship, undeniable Love, acceptance, support and then marriage. But you know, I don't how that will happen, but hey I'm open! In the meantime though, still finding contentment in my life as it is. Also still striving to BE BETTER, do better and go after those thing I REALLY want and see myself doing. Even if no one else does! In light of this, Ladies I want to share this piece of wisdom that never grows old for me.

..."Don't look for YOUR joy or happiness in anyone else! Don't seek nor allow another person be the primary source for these things for you! Be content with yourself first!" If someone special comes into your life, (a mate, or a new friend for example) their job is to ADD to your life. They are to add positivity to the positive way you already view yourself and what's happening in your life. They are not to be the primary source for your happiness!

Don't allow yourself to become dependent on someone else to provide that for you! That's a tough job, a heavy burden that no one has the ability to perform successfully without a great deal of pain. Putting your complete happiness in someone else and expecting them to be responsible for you in this way, is not fair to them! Besides, you can't control people! And if you try, you are only asking for trouble. We each have our own minds! We're human and humans are flawed! We often let each other down by either the choices we make, things we say or do!

FIND CONTENTMENT IN YOUR OWN LIFE! Then, that which you desire will be attracted to that light! Usually, no one who is healthy of mind, self-esteem and character, is going to want an emotionally dependent person, primarily relying on them for joy, happiness or completion. I've personally been on both sides of that situation. When I was more dependent and less self assured, (back in the day) I got my feelings hurt! As I begun to grow more self assured and finding Joy for myself, I ran into the problem of weak men looking to hook up with me because they admired my strength! They said things like, "If I had a strong woman like you, I would be a better man. I would be alright. I would be able to achieve things." My response would be, "Why can't you become a better man, be alright and go achieve things before you talk to me? No productive woman who cares about herself and trying to achieve things is going to want a dependent, clingy man dragging her down." And Women, that's the way a lot of men think too! I said it once already, twice I think, Now I'll say it again,

"BE CONTENT WITH SELF, FIRST!"

THANKS FOR READING "

"FOR WOMEN ONLY."

FOR WOMEN ONLY!-JUST A CHILD!

Hey Sister Girls!

I know! I KNOW! You were expecting an article last week, I've been slightly behind. Won't tell you the reasons, (or excuses) Not necessary. But as always, I have good stuff for you this time. Though, if you've been reading my blog for a while, then you know, I never disappoint. To make it up to you, I am doubling up on articles this week women. So, are you ready?

Met another lady this weekend in Self-Defense training that has been going through a lot lately with addiction and abuse. Memories from her past, haunted her. To recognize that and support her, I stood up (as I was sitting down). I stood up as she spoke, as a gesture that I now stand with her as she once again seeks to conquer those demons. She is a woman in her late 40's, early 50's and is still haunted by abuse as a young girl and young woman. See, it reminds us all that attacks on the female has happened to millions of us! WE MUST STAND UP!

STAND UP WOMEN AND BE COUNTED!

Stand up and let your voice be heard.

Let your outrage be felt! Let your arms reach out to other females that are in such awful pain and chained to the past. Let your compassion flow and your selfishness fall to the waist side. Let your knees buckle underneath you as you seek Gods face in prayer for the women of this world! so in my own way, I open my heart in support of you now! And for my dear new Sister Girl, that I met this weekend, I dedicate this to you.

"INSPIRATION STATION"

JUST A CHILD

By Ms. Meetta J. Martin

From her book, "You Can't Say That!"

Poetry To Strengthen, Heal and Encourage"

She was just a child!

She didn't like the tears she was cursed to cry.

She wanted to smile, but she couldn't because of the pain inside.

Her innocence was stolen away from her

by people who were expected to naturally love and protect her.

Family! and friends of,

She was abused!

Her heart was confused...

...confused about real love!

She was just a child!

She didn't deserve her painful life.

Full of innocence and wonder,

She needed someone to really love, protect and care for her!

She was a child!

SHE WAS JUST A CHILD!

We were the same age, she was my friend.

People thought I was too Young to understand.

Though my young age may have prevented me from knowing much,

though being young in age unversed in wisdom,

my young heart understood pain.

I cold never figure how I could see, but the did not!

Couldn't hey the older, supposed to be wiser, folk,

see the sadness in her eyes?

Couldn't they hear the horror, in her voice, as she spoke up about

not wanting to be left at home with certain people?

Couldn't they see how withdrawn and how quiet she became?

I was a child as young as she AND I COULD SEE!

No one would listen to her,, nor to me.

so, as I wen tot church and sang "Yes Jesus Love me.", I knew there was a God and I knew how to pray.

So I, a child as young as she, used to pray in secret,

"Oh God, come and save her."

"Strengthen the heart that you gave her. Help her to survive."

She was just a child!

Now that we are older, she doesn't hurt as much anymore any longer.

I know God heard her cries and the prayers of mine, cause she survived!

Oh! My friend? Well, she went on to teach, preach as she was grateful to God, the Father for breaking the binds that had her.

She is no longer, just a child!

*Strength and courage to all my sister girls, no matter what stage in life that you are. HOPE AND HEALING, ARE AGELESS AND they are both never ending!

TALK WITH YA LATER! MEETTA

FOR WOMEN ONLY!-JUST LISTEN

IT'S DOUBLES WEEK SISTERS.

HERE IS NUMBER 2!

INSPIRATION STATION

JuSt... LiSteN!

By Meetta Martin

From Her Book; "You Can't Say That!";

Poetry To Strengthen, Heal & Encourage~(2002)

Stop telling me what you know and that you understand.

SHHHH!

Be a true friend and for once today,

and just listen!

Stop giving me advice just for a moment

and just listen!

RIGHT NOW, I need a compassionate, listening friend!

So, if you want to hang around, stop judging and giving me your opinion!

SHHH! JUST LISTEN.

Come!

Come here and sit with me awhile in silence.

Let's enjoy the peaceful quiet that fills the room.

Shhh! Just listen.

So peaceful and calm....

....I didn't break today.

Steady your breathing.

Can you hear my heart beating in the still after the storm,

you've just helped me through?

Shhh! Just Listen.

BYE!

FOR WOMEN ONLY!- BROKEN

Hey Women!

My Sister Girls.

"No matter that we are not related. Nor have we ever met.

We are all united by humanity.

So I hereby pronounce you ALL ...

My Sister Girls."

Sister Girls, there are many ways in which we area expected to be. Many ways that we tolerate society. We assume our positions as nurses, doctors, teachers, lawyers, nurturers...daughters, mothers, wives ....we assume our positions as lovers. Lovers to men, some women prefer to be lovers to each other (lesbians), but we are not talking about those here! That's another subject to be dealt with on this site, as of yet.

Still, for those of us who have been in relationships with a man, want to be or are still in them! There is something to be said about when a man does not want a complete and confident woman, but one who is broken, timid or scared! I'm not talking about men, who are gentle, kind, men who care. I'm talking about the men who want to use the broken woman to fulfil some need of power in themselves!

There are men, who want women like this! Women who are beaten down in some kind of way. Women who may be confused, who the the man thinks can be put back together, but only by him! He may want women who may also be living in fear, (broken) of not having a man! So they take advantage of the you, woman! Don't be fooled, there are men (maybe you have been or are with one of them) who are out there thinking like this! Men who want this in the woman they are with, so HE CAN BE IN CONTROL! So that HE can feel superior, feel dominate and strong!

But I challenge this way of thinking in a man. If I could, this is what I would tell them. I would say, "Really man, how strong do you really think you are, seeking to control that which is physically or emotionally weaker, emotionally broken down. Maybe you didn't cause this in her, but you are as bad as that guy who did that to her!

You pretend to be her friend, someone who really cares for her. She doesn't know the truth because you are so good at not showing it! Then again, some of you men are SO BOLD AND BAD, that you may even announce it to her in conversation. You announce it to her, thinking she is so battered and beaten down that she will just BE SO GLAD just to have a man around! So she puts up with YOU instead! But I say Tsk. Tsk, to you foolish men!"

Wisdom can't seem to stop them, those kind of men! Understanding, and compassion have given up trying to be their friends. Instead, they push on, these men. They push on towards the broken these kind of women. They push on, swooping in for the plundering of her, smelling her weakness like a bloodhound! Wanting a woman who is broken, so they can put her back together like a puzzle. So HE can put her back together the way HE wants her!

Women I know some of you may be thinking,

"Meetta, my dear sweet Sister, where has this come from?". I will say, in my life time, I've heard this said from a man. In fact, I've heard it said by several men! As I have conversations with many people in my lifetime, people have said some things that haunt me. And as I grew up in a household full of males, and as James Brown put it, "This is a man's world", the way that a man thinks interests me! In my family, there were 4 boys and one baby girl...Me! It was a dreadful, but enlightening existence to live among them. It was a challenge!

As a woman, I've come to understand that there is much to be said about the man's perspective. So when I can talk with those of the opposite sex about certain things, even taking advantage of conversations with my male co-workers... I listen.

The tale of controlling women, especially those that are deemed broken, has for a long time, concerned me! The wisdom in knowing how some men deem women, has never left me. It has struck me as a serious underlying cause of brutality and the emotional abuse and neglect of women AND THE MEN! And years ago, I wrote a poem expressing my hearts sorrow and anguish at the same time, about this! Let me share it with you in Inspiration Station coming right underneath this article.

"BROKEN", the poem is just below this post

STAY TUNED!

"TALK" WITH YA SOON.

MEN, WOMEN & CHILDREN-BROKEN, The Poem

"INSPIRATION STATION"

"BROKEN"

Poem By Meetta Martin (2002)

BROKEN: In pieces;

Imperfect; Ill or dispirited; Out of order

Why is it

that some people prefer you to be broken, for them to love and care for you?

Why would they want someone who is in pieces, in such bad shape, to be with?

How can someone be SO unhappy and insecure with themselves, that

a person broken in pieces, is the kind of person that they seek?

A person, one who is dependent and needy.

What is that for, validation?

Superiority?

Some people will even go so far as to challenge and break you

because you are not as needy as THEY need you to be!

I went through this with a companion some time ago.

He and I had started to be really good friends.

So close in fact that I considered him, family.

The more time we spent together though

I noticed that things were getting different.

See, I was going through some tough times.

Splitting from my sons Dad, had messed with me financially and with my mind.

But as the months went on, I had started getting stronger.

This is specifically when my friend and I started to experience rough tides.

After a few seriously heated discussions with him, my friend and companion,

I learned that he had a problem with me emotionally growing!

He said, he hurt because I no longer depended on him, I no longer needed him so much.

It validated him to know that he could "fix me", if you will.

I stared at this guy, my friend, in amazement.

I thought "THIS IS CRAZY! How could I have missed this in him".

He was sitting there telling me that he had a problem with my emotional growth

and new found strength!

I know men ant o feel needed, but this guy wanted me to remain weak!

Giving him his time to speak, I learned the it was true, so shocking to me,

that he was a person who attaches himself to people he deemed "broken",

out of order, ill or dispirited.

He wanted to "help" them put themselves back together again.

The problem was, he couldn't handle when they were able to stand on their own again.

He attaches himself to people who he thinks are broken and tries to help them

as opposed to helping AND just being with them because he simply likes them!

For him it is validation. He takes pride in his creation.

It's just that he could not deal with strength and independence.

My companion wanted me to "lean more" on him!

I tell you now as I didn't know this then,

I made a mistake leaning so heavily on my companion, my then friend.

It would have be grand had I knew back then,

to trust and call upon the name of the Lord, laying my burdens on him!

I am not meant to be broken, depending on some man,

just waiting for his chance to claim me as his "new creation".

Rather than, caring for me being gentle and kind

because his heart is full of compassion.

I don't need to lean on a man like my then companion.

Some man who is so insecure with himself, that EVEN in my pain,

he looks for validation!

The man that comes to claim me will be a man who can

celebrate WITH ME!

Celebrate the fact that I'm grown, strong and standing on my own!

Little need I say though,

back then, my companion and I soon parted ways because

he could not understand and I could not settle for...such a weak man.

Broken.

Meetta